Monday, September 20, 2010

White Russians and Ringers


Announcing the return of our weekly segment honoring the honorable and identifying the guilty. For the record "White Russians" are delicious beverages that prove vodka mixes with every thing but milk, unless of course you have coffee liquor, then we are back in business. In other words "White Russians" are good. "The Ringer" is a brief case full of dirty undies. Obviously bad.

White Russians

Home Field Advantage



Roddy Jones
Two receptions, one for a touchdown, and one on a big third and long for a first down, but the really impressive thing was the TigerTiger (what all ferocious hits will be called for now on thanks to Clemson and Auburn) cut blocking.

Sean Bedford
Big old dented helmet by the end of the game. Bedford blew up the man in front of him on several fourth and shorts.

TJ Barnes
The only way this defense is going to become substantially better is if players start stepping up their games. Barnes did this, with four solo tackles and one assist. When in the game he was consistently double teamed. He really gave the Heels problems. The next step for the red shirt sophomore is to play like this consistently.

Brandon Watts
Modest numbers for the day, but the red shirt freshman Linebacker did an excellent job limiting UNC Tight End Zack Pianalto. Pianalto caught a lot of passes but was never able to break one for any meaningful yardage as Watts was right on top of him and was a sure tackler.

Orwin Smith
The 73 yard touchdown was nice, but its easy to run when everyone in front of you has already been knocked to the ground. Smith's real contribution was on special teams. He averaged 14.3 yards a return, but he did it with a certain joy d'chaos.

Scott Blair
Me likey makey field goals! and they were right down the middle.

The Ringer

Being Mean to Little Kids

The kid side of me loves the frosted evilness, but the adult side of me represses these feelings and suffers from hypertension.

Phil Smith
Bad false start penalty. On fourth and short it's going to be Nesbitt behind Bedford. Everyone knows that. You could sit down like Finch in "Wildcats" and no one would have cared. Anyway, Smith knows this. I'm sure Coach Johnson had Smith over for tea and biscuits just to smooth out any little misunderstandings.

The Allstate "Chaos Like Me" Adds
You're a handsome actor. After seeing your face seven hundred times on Saturday, you now haunt my dreams. Go Away. Forever.


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