Running with the Devil!

How do we deal with the UnDead?

Make a Deal with the Devil.

How does Paul Johnson deal with the UnDead?

Shot gun blast their heads clean off, Zombie Style!

We at the Barrel have no idea how Tech is going to defend Virginia, because Virginia is awful. The Cavaliers are 85th in scoring offense, 100th in rushing offense, and 82nd in passing offense. Sure they beat UNC, Indiana, and Maryland over the last three weeks, but those teams are also awful. What we do know is that UVA heave-hoed the spread attack they tried to install this spring despite the fact they new going in it was going to take two years to fully implement. So we'll be seeing the same thing we've seen from UVA the past few years. A morbid attack that makes zombies look quick and efficient. The UnFired will role out a hack-kneed, dog eared high school drama club interpretation of an NFL "game plan" It will suck to watch, and it will suck even more if it starts to work. Have you seen Night of the Living Dead? It'll be something like that. The heroine will keep falling down as the zombies stumble toward her and you'll find yourself screaming "Jesus! Get up and Run! You deserve to die!! "

The UnFired and his minions have been hold-up in their evil laboratory all week pouring over game film, dissecting frogs and Tech's defense, reanimating bodies with lightning, and sewing Cedric Peerman's right arm onto a pack of wolves, you know, UnDead kind of stuff. For a chess playing NFL coach the "game plan" is a package of plays developed for this weeks opponent. It is designed to take advantage of any weaknesses spotted during film sessions. College coaches usually tweak their offenses for each week's opponent. The results are kind of the same, but the approaches are different. In UVA's case the game plan isn't so much an attack as a slow wondering towards the end zone until you remove their heads with a shot gun, gulf club or shovel.

Last year's "game plan" consisted of a never ending string of pitches, screens and draws to Cedric Peerman who then stiff-armed his way to 700 yards of offense. Peerman's gone this year, and Tech has more than one health linebacker, so this years "game plan" should be different.

If we could mind meld with the UnFired and hear what he's thinking it would probably be, "their rush defense is "not bad" but the pass defense is rancid. The linebackers tend to get too close to the line, compensating for poor tackle play, and the corner backs give to much cushion. I bet we could run a crap ton of crossing routs like Miami and FSU. These guys loose players running across the field all the time." Pauses to add eye of newt to bubbling cauldron. "But our pass protection blows. We give up four sacks a game. heck we gave up five sacks to Maryland last week" throws giant electrical switch which ignites at 72 foot tall Jacob's ladder, "better run lots of screens and draws to slow down Derrick Morgan. The runs won't do anything, but we have to keep them honest" smacks hunch backed offensive coordinator Greg Brandon. "Man we suck"

"Our offensive line is the all "looks like Tarzan plays like Jane" team. Even Tech should be able to get pressure with only three our four guys regularly. If the tackles continue their good play from last Saturday it should free up the linebackers to watch the delayed plays out of the back field, and drop into coverage filling the middle of the field and disrupting the crossing routes. I'm smart, not like people say I am..."

Lets not get it twisted. Tech's defense ain't great, but its better than UVA's offense. Even if the Mississippi State defense shows up, there is no reason to believe UVA can keep pace with Tech's offense. The key to defense this week will be not turning the ball over on offense. Keep the defense in a good position and smack those womp rats when they stick their heads out!