The Compulsive Gambler's Guide to the Galaxy....pt.4

Back at it tonight as Mormons invade Las Vegas to fight against Oregon State. That 's Mormons against Beavers. But we already knew that to be the case. Mormons are against anything fun....that's why they condone polygamy. Onward with our picks. We've reached Thursday, December 31st, for those keeping track.

• Armed Forces Bowl - Houston (-4.5) vs. Air Force. Should actually be an interesting game to watch with Houston throwing the ball all over & Air Force running the Veer. Did you know that Colorado Springs, home of the Air Force Academy, is also the self-proclaimed home of Christian Evangelism in America? Take that for what it's worth. Case Keenum puts up another statistical smorgasbord and the Cougars win....

Let's watch & see if Keenum is a system guy or really that talented...

• The Sun Bowl - Oklahoma (-9.5) vs. #21 Stanford. Did you know that the Sun Bowl replaces the Gator Bowl as the #2 ACC bowl next year? If that's not motivation to win the ACC I don't know what is. "El Paso in January: what dreams are made of....". Stanford has International Harvester clone Toby Gerhardt playing tailback. They don't have starting QB Andrew Luck. Oklahoma has DT Gerald McCoy but no Sam Bradford. In a battle of back-up QB's always use the moustache as the deciding factor....

Oklahoma QB Landry Jones' moustache gives the edge to the Sooners (but that is a lot of points)

• Texas Bowl - Missouri (-8.5) vs. Navy. Tread wearily here, gambling public. Our affinity for Navy football is well documented here. We love the Triple Option. What goes unnoticed about Navy this year is their great defense. We're not sure they'll win but we'll take Bill the Goat & the points....

Ricky Dobbs set a new season mark with 24 rushing TD's.....

• Insight Bowl - Minnesota (-2.5) vs. Iowa State. Exhibit #1 why there are too many bowls. Two crappy teams playing in a crappy bowl. We're guessing this will be like watching old people have sex- awkward, painful, & not the least bit titillating. Thankfully the game is on the NFL Network, which no one gets. Ironic that with Gophers wideout Eric Decker sidelined by an injury it's highly probable not a single future NFL player will be on the field....

OHHHH SNAP!!!

That shit is burned in your brain & now you hate us & the Insight Bowl....

• Chik-fil-a Bowl - #11 Viginia Polly (-4.5) vs. Tennessee. The Whiner vs. The Brat. Are laser-guided munitions an option here? Let's call this the Appalachia InBred Bowl. We'll take VPISU & support the ACC but if something bad happens at the Dome it's Romeo that's the structural engineer...

Just what we need....

Importing more rednecks into Atlanta for the VPISU-Tennessee game....